Date: November 15, 2006
Title: "Stutter Punch"
Author: Craig Bottrell
Submitted to: Hollywoodscript.com
Format: SP
Pages: 120
Time: Present
Locale: Las Vegas
Genre: Action/drama
LOGLINE:The only opponent prize fighter Johnny Ray McTavish can't
knock out is his past.
QUICK COMMENT-this script skillfully drags the reader across an
emotional gamut of fear, pain, pity, love, anger, joy, and triumph.
A winner.
Concept: Very good
Characterization: Excellent
Dialogue: Excellent
Story Line: Very good
Setting/Prod. Values: Excellent
Freshness of Story: Very Good
SYNOPSIS: A title contender with a sever stutter, unable to come
to terms with his past, allows his torment to cause him to lose
the thing he loves the most: Boxing.
Ridicule, abuse, abandonment and murder. These things poisoned
the childhood of prize fighter Johnny Ray (Whitey) Mctavish.
Even now Whitey can't seem to forget the day the school yard bullies
tormented him over his severe stutter before sending him to the
pavement with a bloody nose. He can't forget it because when he
was running
home to what he thought would be a sympathetic loving mother, he
discovered she was abandoning him. As it turned out, she really
didn't have much of a choice. It was either run or end up dead
at the hands
of her drunken abusive husband, Whitey's father.
And Whitey certainly can't forget his father. The old man blamed
Whitey for his mother's exit and gave him regular reminders of
this fact with his belt. But one day the drunken man went too far
when
he split his son's forehead wide open with the buckle. When the
injured Whitey regained consciousness he discovered his abuser
on the living
room floor in a drunken coma covered with dried vomit. Staggering
to his feet, Whitey stumbled over to his unconscious father and
glowered at him silently. This moment would change the young Whitey
forever
for after a few moments the wounded child would unleash a violent
flurry of kicks that shattered his father's voice box. The old
man's breathing immediately transformed to a wheeze as he choked
to death
before his emotionally and physically traumatized young son.
More than thirty years later these haunting images continue to
fuel Whitey's internal fire of rage that fans his self-destruction.
But,
at the age of thirty-nine, and with the help of his mentor, trainer
and only friend, Eli Black, Whitey finally has a chance of turning
it all around. He's finally earned his shot at the light-heavyweight
title and he's a shoe-in.
Eli's experience as a black heavyweight in a white man's world
has taught him what tough is. And Whitey is tough and strong and
fit
and fast. All he has to do to win is get out of his head, forget
the past and focus on the task at hand. Sadly for Johnny Ray old
habits die hard for days before his title bout he stumbles upon
the assault of his elderly neighbor, Gloria Brown, and intervenes.
His
disdain for bullies fills him with rage and drives him to use fatal
force on the attacker. Despite support from Gloria and her daughter,
Timmika Kane, the courts send Whitey to prison for manslaughter
causing him to lose his shot at the title.
In prison Whitey learns the hard way that each day could be his
last. The only person he need fear more than the head of ruthless
Russian
contingent - Vlademir Gregor - is head guard Bobby John Keegan.
But Whitey does need help and he gets it from an unlikely friend
in cell
mate Sean 'Squeaky' Sullivan. Squeaky's jail house savvy helps
Whitey navigate the turbulent sea of prison life and ensures he
survives
his vicious clashes with Vlad and a life threatening beating from
Keegan.
Once out of prison, and unable to get his boxing license reinstated,
Johnny Ray relies on Eli to help him get back on his feet. The
old man gives him a place to live and a job at his gym. But White
quickly
tires of his demeaning role as toilet cleaner and he longs for
his former life of a pugilist. He decides to use a prison connection
to contact Alexi Yackov, the head of the Russian-controlled world
of no-holds-barred, bare-knuckle fighting. Against Eli's judgment
Whitey enters this perilous world and his proficiency in self-defense
sees him sail through his initial fights relatively unscathed.
His
wins have him pulling in good money and he soon gets his own place
and gains his independence. Things finally appear to be going smoothly
for Whitey until Timmika complicates his life when she reappears
on the scene in an attempt to repay her debt to him and help him
come to terms with his past
Whitey is apprehensive about developing a relationship with Timmika,
but her patience and commitment allow her to finally penetrate
his tough exterior. She reaches deep into Whitey's soul and drags
him
back from his emotional abyss and helps him trust again. This,
along with Eli's persistence, eventually convinces Johnny Ray it's
time
to get out of it once and for all after a near fatal match with
the merciless Scotsman Henry "The Hitman" Windsor.
For the first time in his life since his mother abandoned him,
Whitey has found the love of a woman. He's actually happy and he
begins
to make plans for his future with Timmika. But the leader of the
fight circuit, Alexi, has other plans.
Alexi offers Whitey five-hundred thousand dollars to fight his
ruthless Russian bodyguard Yurgei. When Whitey refuses, Alexi kidnaps
Timmika
leaving the ex-con with no choice but to face off with the Soviet
giant.
The sense of this event is that this will be a fight that will
go all the way.
All of his life Eli has been telling Whitey to get out of his head
and forget the past. But the moment before Whitey walks into the
valley of death to face Yurgei, Eli changes his tune. The old man
looks sternly into Whitey's bright blue eyes and tells him to “get
inside ya head on this one, feel the hate...”
Although Whitey has learned that his aggressive tendencies clash
violently with his burning desire to save his soul, he knows his
most lethal instincts are the only thing that will save him in
his life and death battle.
COMMENTS: STUTTER PUNCH is an intense action/drama packed with
brutal conflict and poignantly understated but passionate romance
that skillfully
drags the reader across an emotional gamut of fear, pain, pity,
love, anger, joy, and triumph. It has it all, a compelling and
endearing
three dimensional star character who will surely break your heart
and supporting characters of great substance, making interpersonal
dynamics between these three individuals totally believable and
satisfying. And even while the much of the story can be all so
painfully realistic,
it only adds to the sweet incongruity of the quiet self-realisation
that occurs. STUTTER PUNCH will make a truly riveting film. RECOMMENDED.
TO
CONTACT WRITER DIRECTLY:
cpbotts@iprimus.com.au
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