HOLLYWOODSCRIPT.COM NEWSLETTER
Welcome to the latest edition of the Hollywoodscript.com Newsletter, which is published by script consultants Craig Kellem, Judy Kellem (http://www.hollywoodscript.com)
THIS NEWSLETTER IS NEVER SPAM.
You are receiving this newsletter because you expressed an interest in screenwriting by subscribing to this newsletter OR requested a read or a free query letter evaluation from Hollywoodscript.Com(s) Craig Kellem or Judy Kellem.
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The purpose of this newsletter is to share information, ideas etc. concerning the fascinating (and elusive) world of screenwriting.
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CONTEST WINNER!!
Big congrats to our latest Monthly Contest Winner, ALBERT ADICKES (aladickes@yahoo.com) for his rockin dramedy, TRAVESTY INLET. It’s the story of a legendary but now out-of -it rock star who agrees to join a hapless garage band. Full of character currency and heart, I think of it as the Full Monty of band stories. As part of his bounty, Al will get plenty of industry exposure on this and, if he fares like many of our recent winners, he’s in for a terrific ride. For your information, it started as one of our WORKS IN PROGRESS (WIP) http://www.hollywoodscript.com/WIP.html
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HOW CAN I TELL IF I’M READY TO WRITE ?
By Craig Kellem
Most professional writers spend more of their time planning their scripts than writing them. For the vast majority, preparation and strategy is the name of the game. In fact, in Hollywood, if you pitch a project (in movies or TV), you don’t actually get to write the script until you’ve written the STORY in voluminous narrative, and have been vetted by hyper vigilant development people. That said, here is a quick method for determining if you’re ready to write the script. This is derived from an article I read years ago about master writer, Paul Schraeder. The following is basically the method that he uses.
He asks a friend to sit in a room with him. He pitches his story, top to bottom, in the most articulate, complete, and raconteur-like manner that he knows. He doles it out the way a doting father would tell a story to his child. Obviously, it has a beginning, middle, and end, it has surprises, often big scenes, and it pays off in the end. And all scenes attempt to offer something special beside just acting as a story component.
If he can lovingly get through it without ad-libbing, lying, etc., he figures he’s probably got a good story to write. He truly believes that if it “tells well,” it will probably write well. The other criteria for this conclusion is if his audience of one seems to enjoy his pitch, doesn’t have to ask a lot of questions, and remains clear-eyed throughout the session. This may seem like an oversimplification, but there’s a lot of truth in it. Because moviemaking, in the final analysis, is just good STORYTELLING.
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BUT IS IT ON THE PAGE?
By Craig Kellem
The mind is a funny thing. Sometimes what we perceive to be true is not true. This happens often with screenwriting when writers think that there’s something on the page that isn’t on the page. This malady is not reserved for wannabes. It happens with pros--a lot.
Recently, I was working with a writer who was adapting a classic novel into a screenplay. The project was being supported by the art division of a major studio. One of the characters, a key one in fact, (in the novel) had always been a bitch. Not just an ordinary bitch, but a real bitch--we’re talking Joan Crawford, Leona Helmsley.
After the first notes meeting, the studio (typically) wanted the writer to “soften” this character. Dutifully, the writer acquiesced--too much. Studio pressure can be formidable.
I knew nothing about this while reading the script, but it didn’t take a rocket scientist to realize that without this saltiness, this character would not be dynamic and the whole script could be adversely affected. I mean, when you’re writing a character flick and your characters are not percolating and, because of this, true dynamics are not occurring, there’s going to be a lot of aimless talking and you’re going to be in trouble.
So I gave the note to the writer--”the character needs to be more brittle and deliciously obnoxious.” She was not at all defensive, and she tweaked the material.
The problem was that the character was still muted in the next draft. The writer thought otherwise. We debated. What an issue! We were both reading the same pages and having different experiences.
Finally, the moment of truth came when we took the time to go page by page with only one criteria: “let’s see where she’s bitchy.”
It was actually an amusing experience because as we hunted through the material, it became apparent that it just wasn’t there. Only by looking at the evidence did she realize how seriously she had taken the studio note, and how ONLY IN HER OWN MIND AND HEART DID THE CHARACTER REMAIN A BITCH.
I guess the lesson here is obvious. Because we, as writers have such vivid perceptions and understandings of our own characters, we can easily assume that the nuances of personality which are so clear to us are just as clear to the reader. We must closely examine our manuscripts making sure what’s in our minds and hearts has actually been written.
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A NICE NOTE FROM A GRATEFUL WRITING TEAM
Dear Craig-
We wanted you to know... We've learned more from you than you could possibly imagine, but it was only when I got back to transcribing our conference that we fully realized how far you'd gone beyond the norm. The transcript came to 18 single-spaced pages — in space-saving Times New Roman font. You talked for 18 pages on a SUNDAY EVENING! Thank you. It's obvious you worked very hard on our script.
VerLynn Kneifl
vjkneifl@gpcom.ne
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PLANTING THE PLOT
By Judy Kellem
A writer friend recently asked that I read and give comments on his script (FYI: he gave permission for me to discuss it here with you). It was a 100-paged screenplay about a man's experience sixty years plus as sailor of a commercial yacht. The protagonist fell in love, got married, experienced icebergs and snowstorms that veered him near death. His wife came and went, he saw two wars come and go through the eyepiece of a telescope. The script had drama, was ripe with theme. Indeed this writer had rendered an action packed panorama reflecting the random (and not so random) series of events to occur during his hero's life at sea.
"But what's the plot?" I asked.
For despite all that detail and action, no palpable plot roots had yet been set. There was no imperative. No narrative crux. No central, suspense filled idea narratively tying this series of life happenings and hardships together.
"It's about his survival of humankind and nature," my friend argued.
"That's not a plot," I kept at him. "You're talking vague, overriding theme . What's the linchpin that drives it all forward?"
“His life miss-cast as a man, feeling at home beyond the shores."
"You're talking theme and character. What plot pulls those ropes tight to set sail?"
His end of the phone went silent. Then there was a labored sigh and, "Okay, let me think about it."
It's a hard one to finger, this differentiating between plot and theme, and story . The very notion these elements can be teased apart still leaves me stumped, though I think (and will here argue) it's true. These elements interweave and overlap so intimately and seamlessly at times as to seem all together synonymous.
But they're not.
And knowing the differences between them, being able to account for each and make sure all are present in the seeding of a great script, is vital.
What would "Silence of the Lambs" be without the point by point plot of Agent Starling being hard pressed to get life saving information from Hannibal Lechter? How would "Lord of the Rings" ring if Froto wasn't under the gun to get that golden band from one place to the next in the nick of time? Yes the drama in both movies is considerable, as many consecutive struggles are suffered and overcome scene by scene along the way, by both lead characters. And a strong coming of age THEME pulses powerfully throughout both scripts. But if either screenplay had lacked a solid PLOT to act as that photosynthesizing drive that propels the gripping characters and touching stories up and out from the muddy grounds of message and conflict, these movies would have probably withered and wilted before us.
Love stories, war stories, tales of fear overcome-- every work of fiction needs an anchoring plot. Plots can be very grandiose: Think Star Wars sized, "Young Farmer Boy must Save A Princess and in turn, fight an Evil Empire". This basic plot thread allows for the larger story of father and son to be deeply and epicly dramatized and creates a structure through which the themes of fate, destiny and cosmic salvation may be profoundly rendered. On a less colossal scale are films like Tom Hanks's flick, CastAway, wherein we have the basic plot thread of a shipwrecked postal worker who develops an imaginary friend. This simple set up permits the story of one man's survival of isolation, loneliness and recognition of his need for "other" to be very heartbreakingly explored, while also providing a forum through which themes of faith and the power of the mind may be beautifully developed. In both cases one finds very strong story and theme but without these hardcore, beat by beat basic plots to carry everything else along, the scripts would have no float.
When clients ask how they can test the earth of their own sewn ideas, it is suggested that they ask the following:
A. What is my film ABOUT?
Love? Pain? Death? Family ties? All of the above?
Here are THEMES.
B. And, WHAT HAPPENS?
Boy and girl fall in love?
Father and son become estranged?
Woman risks her life for her sister?
Here is STORY.
C. But HOW do these themes and this story ACTUALLY UNFOLD?
Boy is hired by girl's Mafia father to assassinate an uncle and
meantime the lovers meet?
In an angry moment, a father tells his son he was adopted and the son sets out to prove his father wrong?
Woman in the jungle is held hostage by crazed cannibals who demand only the sister can save her?
There is the PLOT. Get clear on how to delineate between each and you’ll be equipped to till your imagination, cultivate the tales you’ve already planted on the page, or set to plow all those untold stories still budding in your soul.
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MAKE YOUR LIFE BETTER BY THINKING OF IT AS A MOVIE
HUMOR by MARK MILLER
One theory about cinema attendance holds that people go to the movies as an escape from their humdrum lives. Whether or not this is true, it's a dangerous theory, and not just because it contains the term "humdrum," whose origin cannot be traced to any living or dead language on this or any other planet.
It's dangerous because it invites continual, depressing comparisons between your drab life and Julia Roberts' more exciting universe, your nothing job and George Clooney's jet-setting, multimillionaire status, your husband and Brad Pitt. It's a wonder movie theater lobbies don't have rows of suicide hotline phone booths.
But don't despair. I have come up with an easy and fun way to avoid these My Life Bites comparisons, and that is to begin thinking of your entire life as though it were an actual movie. And not just "a" movie--a great movie, a thrilling movie, the mother of all movies! How do you do this? By applying positive quotes, all those superlatives, from actual movie ads to your own miserable, pathetic, soul-draining existence.
Try it. You've watched plenty of movies. You may have even attempted to write one or two -- or fifteen, for the truly stubborn among you. You've seen a gazillion movie ads. You have all the raw material at hand to turn your sad, boring, problem-plagued life into something truly special. At least, in your own mind. Ladies and gentlemen, what I am proposing is nothing short of the fact that you have the power to change your own perception of your own reality. And I'm sure that there are many out there, even besides the Moody Blues and the various pharmaceutical companies, who would agree.
Let's take a look at how this might work for an average woman named Kathy...
Monday morning, Kathy wakes up in Movie Quote Mode, looks at herself in the bathroom mirror, and notes her appearance as irresistible, delicious, one of the triumphs of the year. She gets dressed, fixes herself the breakfast of a lifetime, and says good-bye to her two cats, in a manner that is touching, hilarious, and unforgettable.
Kathy drives to work, enjoying the coastline view. It is a must-see view, the view of a lifetime, a view that redefines nature. Naturally, Kathy arrives at work feeling on top of the world. And why not? Her job as a factory assembly line worker is something truly special, an adrenaline rush, pure entertainment.
Delivering a tour-de-force performance on the job, Kathy treats herself to a lunch which is nothing short of extraordinary, stunning, magical. Later, Kathy's supervisor takes her aside and informs her that her on-the-job performance shows off a vibrant intelligence, demonstrates a virtuoso's exhilarating grasp of all aspects of assembly line socks packaging, and represents nothing less than the reinvention of mainstream American factory production.
After work, Kathy enjoys a blind date with a man whose conversation reveals such depth, wit, and blazing originality that it places him in the front ranks of American marital possibilities. Kathy isn't just engrossed by him, she is actually intoxicated by his presence--high on the discovery of how pleasurable a man can be. Before taking leave, Kathy admits both to herself and to him that she finds him passionate, captivating, and gloriously alive.
Stopping for groceries on the way home, Kathy engages the produce manager in a conversation about the ripeness of the melons. His discourse on fruit proves to be an absolute laugh riot from beginning to end. Kathy realizes that she's not just having her question answered, she's also having a gleefully merry time. She thanks him, grateful for his rich pockets of humor and sweetness.
Kathy makes one last stop, to pick up the painting she had framed. She finds it to be an overwhelming vision, pure gold, the single best-framed painting of the year. At home, Kathy places it on the wall, steps back, and takes it in. It is even more joltingly alive now than it was in the store--gripping, grabbing, a head-on collision of thought-provoking emotions.
As usual, Kathy calls her mother to share the details of her day, which she describes as the year's most heart-stopping drama--thrilling, unforgettable, glowing with substance and charm. In one of their most vibrant and dazzling conversations to date, Kathy and her mother capture something special between them. It is indeed a conversation which should be heard by anyone who cares about great American conversations.
Hungry now, Kathy decides to prepare a pasta dish containing a mixture of tastes she finds rhapsodic, erotic, and stunning--a voluptuous blend of seafood and sauces. The meal is a masterwork. Kathy can't help but shout, "Bravo!" The feeling even carries over to her doing the dishes, which she finds infectiously entertaining, a compelling, edge-of-her-seat adrenaline rush.
Moving to her closet, Kathy selects her clothing for tomorrow. She chooses an old fashioned, romantic dress that sweeps her up in its grandeur. It is everything you put on a dress for--a feast for the eyes, the ears, and the heart. Kathy congratulates herself upon once again choosing an outfit which is rich, understated, delightful, and seamless.
Suddenly, Kathy hears a strange noise. It is terrifying, gripping, chilling. The suspense is entertainment of the highest order. Hearing it does for one-bedroom condos what "Jaws" did for the beach. Kathy finds herself swept up in its intense, searing, startling, heart-pounding mystery. When at last she finds it was only her cat knocking over a vase, Kathy experiences a gleefully merry time, one of the most memorable relief experiences she's likely to have this year.
Kathy's nightly flossing session is indeed a towering achievement, a stylish, fast-paced, slickly energetic rarity which touches her heart and mind. Kathy's resulting smile is immensely affecting, powerful, miraculous. Kudos to this contagious, irresistible smile which kicks off the night on a high note.
Turning to face the full-length mirror, Kathy takes herself in, pronouncing herself superb, heroic, wonderfully touching, nothing short of sensational--a woman who celebrates the art of survival, the gift of laughter, and the miracle of connection. She, truly, is a woman of the highest order--a bravura, must-see woman. Finally, intoxicated by the promise of tomorrow, realizing that she is living the legend in a beguilingly unpredictable fashion, once again, Kathy gives herself and her life two enthusiastic thumbs up!
MARK MILLER is a former stand-up comic and current Los Angeles-based comedy writer, who has written and produced TV sit-coms and features, been a humor columnist for the Los Angeles Times Syndicate, contributed to national publications, and has produced a weekly comedic relationships feature for America Online.
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PLANNING A SCRIPT is an act of simplification. It's a blueprint for a practical, doable approach to getting something down on paper. Keep your template lean and clear.
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Y0U’RE S0 VAIN
What do the following comments about screenwriting have in common?
*“There are a boatload of scripts out there that are suffering from too much weight. Their stories are encumbered by so much rhetoric that it's hard to find the spine. If you can't find the spine, you can't find the story and that's bad news.”
*“Talking heads and exposition don’t not usually make for great entertainment.”
*“The attempt to sell more than one project in the same query letter, takes away from them both.”
ANSWER: They’re typical comments offered in our previous newsletters which always trigger emails from writers who think we are talking about THEM. It makes me wonder how many others think the same things but DON’T write to us.
And then we get the calls, “um..you know that article you had in your newsletter..you know the one about the convoluted synopsis..the one that you referred to as a (gulp) career ender..well I was just wondering if ..well, I mean, were you um...possibly..talking about...me.
Kidding aside, I get a real kick out of this phenomenon. So let me respond once and for all. Most of the problems we run into are universal in nature. They’re situations that all writers experience. It’s rarely, if ever, the result of some terrible thing a particular writer does that must be “documented.”
I enjoy the human quality of this, and can MORE THAN RELATE. It’s just another thing I love about writers and our quintessential paranoia. I just wish we got letters when we talk about what DOES work and how grand it is. Never happens.
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FROM SUSAN SHAUGHNESSY’S “WALKING ON ALLIGATORS”
I knew I was supposed to be a writer; I had made that declaration in the closet of my soul.
Padgett Powell
When do you become a writer?
When you first write?
When your writing is first praised?
When your writing is first published?
No self definition can come from outside. You don’t “become a writer” because others say that you have written well. You become a writer when you tell yourself that this is what you are. If you have a fundamental self-honesty, you will then write. You will carry out the activity you have linked with your deepest identity. Your membership card as a writer is issued in the closet of your soul.
Today, I’ll see what I think in the closet of my soul. I will make my declaration there.
Copyright Susan Shaughnessy
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SCRIPTBLASTER has an incredibly vast data base of producers, agents, managers and the like. They can zap your coverage or query directly into the hands of many viable Hollywood producers, agents, managers etc. A unique feature is that the emails will be generated from your own personal email so industry professionals will respond directly to you. (http://www.scriptblaster.com)
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